You have reached the Wendy's Twitter lady

Look, I didn't really want to make this page but I kept running into what I can only describe as viral slop about myself, including one featuring a photo of a completely different woman. So here I am.

This one got my photo right, at least.

Here are some answers to the questions I get asked the most.

What are you up to now?

I worked in social media for a long time, mostly in tech, and now I am a writer.

I heard they fired you over the roast tweets.

Nope.

Why did you stop working there?

Personal reasons.

How does it feel when people use your face to sell their ebooks or whatever?

It feels weird, thanks for asking.

Did you get some kind of bonus? Are you rich now?

That's not really how advertising works. I aspire to someday own a home.

Did you kill the Duolingo owl?

I've never worked for Duolingo, and I've been advised not to answer that question without an attorney present.

How did you get the Wendy's job?

I put my Twitter account on my resume and my boss thought I was funny.

Have you heard about Say You'll Remember Me by Abby Jimenez?

Yes, I have heard that the protagonist runs social media for a mustard company and was recruited from the Wendy's marketing department. I haven't read it yet!

Could I hire you to do social media for me?

Thank you for your interest, but I no longer work in social media.

Why don't you work in social media anymore?

I stopped enjoying it.

I tried to ask you about the Wendy's stuff once and you were weird about it.

Yeah, that sounds right. It was a lot to process. It wasn't you! Sorry!

How's it feel that your life's greatest work is a cheeseburger ad?

My children are my life's greatest work. And if my attention span ever recovers maybe I'll string a bunch of tweets together and accidentally write a book.

Do you still eat Wendy's?

I do, but not as often since we moved to California. Not as many Wendy's out here.

What's your go-to Wendy's order?

Double Stack no onion, small chocolate Frosty.

Did you get a lot of free Wendy's?

Free Wendy's isn't a corporate benefit, but they do let employees taste test new stuff they're developing. That part was pretty cool.

Roast me!

Grow up.